The Gift of Love - Embracing Intensity

I LOVE to give meaningful gifts – so much so that if I find the perfect gift, I never want to wait until the next appropriate gift giving occasion.

That said, I HATE getting gifts just for the sake of getting gifts. If I don’t have the time to find something meaningful, I often forget or go for a gift certificate because then they can find something useful.

So how to we find meaningful gifts that don’t cost lots of money?

I recently posted the question to my Facebook group, League of Excitable Women, “What would be the best gift someone could give you that doesn’t cost money?”

Always a source of helpful information, Stacie Forbes of the e-Research Boutique, said, “Depends on the recipient. I like the 5 love languages, so: (1) love language = physical touch, then hugs or massage; (2) love language = quality time, then time and undivided attention; (3) love language = gifts, then hand written letter or home-made item; (4) love language = words of affirmation, then a recorded message or note of all the reasons you love the person; and (5) love language = acts of service, then home cooked dinner, laundry, or babysit.”

I had heard of the 5 Love Languages, but never really looked deeply into them. Turns out my highest language is in acts of services and my lowest is in receiving gifts. No wonder I’m not big on giving gifts just for the sake of giving them because they are expected. Among my Excitable friends, things involving quality time were the most popular.

Here are some ideas you might consider:

Acts of Service

An invitation to a home cooked dinner
Help clean the house
Clean and fold laundry
Offer to babysit
Offer to run errands

Quality Time

A one on one coffee/tea date with no distractions, where we really listen to each other. And laugh a LOT

Going on a walk or hike to spend quality time with them
Come and sit and talk at me while I clean. For some reason I can mega clean if someone it talking to me while I do it
Sitting up and talking until all hours
A field trip to somewhere where I can pet puppies

Physical Touch,

A hug
A massage
Some cuddle time
Scratching my back
Playing with my hair

Words of Affirmation

Expressions of love
A recorded message
A note of all the reasons you love the person
Expressions of gratitude
Appreciating their quirks

Receiving Gifts

A hand written letter
A home made container garden, full of succulents from their garden
Passing along a much loved book
A hand made gift
Materials for a recycled art project

Comments (15)

Natalie PlanetSmartyPants

This certainly made me think about languages of love in my family. I think I am a “gift person” while my husband is “act of service” person. Daughter, of course, loves presents, but also can’t get enough affirmations of love.
- auroraremember
  
  Thanks! I had always meant to check out the love languages more, but this was a good reminder to explore it!
Caitie

I love these ideas. Truly heartfelt gifts- the best kind! Thanks for sharing 🙂
- auroraremember
  
  Thanks! It was fun to see what other people came up with as well!
Linda Wallin

Great ideas! Thanks! I will borrow some of these for this Christmas!
- auroraremember
  
  Thanks! I wasn’t sure how I was going to approach the issue until it all came together!
Paula Prober

Aurora. These are fabulous ideas. And what a great structure to use for this post. I’ve heard of that book and know many people have found it to be useful. Thanks!
- auroraremember
  
  Thanks Paula! Yeah, now I want to check it out more!
Jo Freitag

Thank you for a great post – a very helpful way of thinking about what would be the ideal gift to express your love for the recipient!
- auroraremember
  
  Thanks Jo! It was a helpful framework for me to organize my thoughts.
Sarah Tan

I’ve read the book before, but somehow forgot to carry the activities. Need to find out more from my husband and children what their love languages are.
- auroraremember
  
  Yeah, they have one you can do for your kids too! I think I’ll check that out. 🙂
  - Denise Janova
    
    Aurora;Could you please tell me where I could find this information about this? Thank you. I feel it will be a helpful in my relationship with my 10 year old, ADHD, Darling Son. I am sure that having this idea, and the actions/words going along with it, will make a big difference in our communication especially once he hits his teen years. {however, since he has always been more advanced then his chronological age, that time might be sooner than that. LOL !}
    The 5 Love Languages is a very important concept that should be used in all our personal relationships. Imagine everyone knowing that they are truly loved and appreciated by those they care about. I believe,in the home, there would be a lot less:Anger, Arguments, Bickering, Conflict, Discipline Issues, . . . etc. In our country, I believe there would be a drop in the number of: Depressed People, Divorce, Runaways, and Suicides: just to name a few.
    - auroraremember
      
      I’m sorry, I thought I had replied to this earlier. The love language test thing is at this link: http://www.5lovelanguages.com/profile/. It gives you the choice of doing it for yourself or for your child. 🙂
Carolyn

I haven’t read this book but will try to find a copy. These are great ideas and way to give gifts.

Comments are closed.